Skip to Content
Talkhouse home
Talkhouse home
Film

Video Essay: The Essence of Agony

Nathan Silver, who has cast his mother Cindy in nearly all his films, tries to make sense of their complex and often fraught working relationship.

It's all Fassbinder's fault. The fact that he cast his mother in his movies made me want to cast my own. When I first started making movies, I would cast her in bit parts. She was an ESL teacher by trade, not an actor, and she definitely had no desire to be one. I always wanted her to write a novel. When I was a pretentious adolescent schmuck of a writer, we used to meet with a Harvard professor to discuss Yiddish literature. My mother's insights into the texts frustrated me to no end. Her understanding of how stories work put me in my place. I was no genius, but maybe she was. I hassled her to write, but to no avail.

After a disastrous scripted first feature film, I decided to make an improvised affair with those closest to me. This turned into Exit Elena. Naturally I cast my mother in one of the lead roles. We allowed her to riff the whole time, and here, my mother the storyteller could show herself. It's no novel, but I think it scratched that itch that I could sense years back during those Yiddish literature meet-ups. I'm not sure that films are healthy, but then again, families certainly aren't healthy either. I'm happy to involve my family in my movies. It allows me to see my mother and we can fight our love out. The interview I conducted with her following a particularly fraught Thanksgiving goes into why we work together even if we're such a volatile pair on set.

Stay in touch

Sign up for our free newsletter

More from Film

Explore Film

Murder, Fever Dreams and Spiritual Reckoning: Behind the Scenes of Wetiko

Writer-director Kerry Mondragon on tumultuous making of his (possibly cursed) new movie Wetiko, out now on digital.

June 10, 2026

Nobody’s Ever Asked Me That: Charles Lane

The genius behind the indie classic Sidewalk Stories opens up about everything from crushing it at Cannes to nearly burning down his family's apartment (twice!).

Fear Factor’s Animal Problem

Filmmaker and writer Lily Lady takes a close look at the most recent iteration of the old-school reality TV show ...

June 9, 2026

The Anti-Anti-Hero

Writer-director Erika Burke Rossa on why, especially at this time, she wants to tell a different kind of story with her film Rain Reign, which just premiered at Tribeca.

June 8, 2026

Three Great Things: Kyra Sedgwick

The award-winning actress, director and producer, who can currently be seen in Carolina Caroline, on her love of family, food and hiking.

June 5, 2026

That Girl in My Films

Documentary filmmaker Ruth Leitman, whose classic Wildwood NJ is back in theaters in a new restoration, examines the dark comedic thread that connects all her work.

June 3, 2026