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Between the Takes

Actress and writer Freya Adams, best known for her lead role in Jennifer Phang’s Advantageous, shares a poem on how life and acting intersect.

I live between takes.

Between the clap of the slate
and the quiet after cut,
when everyone exhales
like the world has briefly remembered
how to breathe.

Acting is a strange priesthood.
You borrow a soul for a few hours
and return it slightly altered.

Some nights,
I wash the characters from my skin,
the way old temples wash their idols —
water, incense, quiet.

Sobriety taught me
the ritual of emptying.

Once,
I filled every silence
with noise and motion —
bad edits, cheap dissolves.

Now I sit still long enough
to hear the other voices.

In the language of parts,
they arrive like actors waiting in the wings:

the frightened child
who learned early how to disappear,

the warrior
who still believes every room
is a battlefield,

the dreamer
who sees entire films
projected on the inside of her eyelids.

They speak in different accents
but bow to the same light.

My teachers say
storytelling is a form of prayer.

The Hindus say the universe itself
is divine performance —
Shiva dancing the cosmos
in and out of existence.

The Sufis spin
until the body becomes a compass
pointing toward love.

In Yoruba temples,
they feed the ancestors
so the living remember their names.

On a set at three in the morning,
with cables coiled like sleeping snakes
and a camera waiting in silence,
I feel all of them standing nearby.

Every story asks the same question:

Can grief become music?

Can the dead speak through us
without taking us with them?

Actors walk a narrow road —
half in shadow,
half in light.

We enter the rooms where sorrow lives,
sit beside it,
learn its language
well enough to translate.

Then we return.

This is the miracle of sobriety:
to visit the underworld
and still come back for breakfast.

Coffee.
Morning sun.
A script with new fingerprints
on the pages.

And somewhere — always —
the world rehearses darker scenes.

A missile practicing its line
in a language of fire.

Jets carving white scars
across the sky.

Sirens rehearsing
their long metallic prayers.

A child asleep beneath a table
while the radio murmurs
about borders.

The world believes
the script is war.

But the quiet teachers whisper otherwise —
the Sufi in the desert wind,
the rishis in the long breath of the Ganges,
the babalawo reading the shells,
and the small voice
inside the miracle text
that says:

what you see
is only the dream of separation.

Between takes
I practice another ritual —

forgiveness.

Because they say
there is no order of difficulty
in miracles.

A nation forgiving a nation
is the same miracle
as forgiving the war
inside my own mind.

The ego writes its epics
in gunpowder.

Spirit edits gently
with light.

And slowly
the work becomes remembering —

that every enemy
is a stranger wearing
my forgotten face.

That heaven is not a distant country
but the moment
we refuse the war
inside the mind.

Somewhere a director calls,

Places.

And again
we step forward,
carrying both worlds
in our hands —

life in one,
death in the other.

Actors in borrowed stories
trying, for a few honest seconds,
to tell the truth.

And sometimes —
if the light is right
and the heart is quiet —

we remember

we were never separate
in the first place.

Just one cast,
standing in the same light,
waiting for the next scene
to begin.

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